Some of them risked death crossing into South Africa via the crocodile-infested Limpopo River, and others suffered further rapes and attacks from men who lurked at the border claiming to be guides.  Yet they have found no respite in South Africa.  Instead they are in an unwelcoming country — outcasts instead of victims — with nowhere to go, nowhere to work, nowhere to live, and nothing to eat.

What if you had to choose between being violently persecuted in your home country, or being an ostracized refugee in a foreign country?  What if you had to make this choice after being brutally gang-raped?  It seems completely unimaginable, yet this is a reality for women in Zimbabwe. 

AIDS-Free World's work to document the widespread and systematic campaign of politically motivated sexual violence in Zimbabwe has been horrifying and heartbreaking.  It is difficult, and perhaps impossible, to adequately convey the brutality of the rapes perpetrated against Zimbabwean women in the last year, or the utter devastation wreaked on their bodies, their minds, their health, their families, their homes and their lives.

Many women who survived their attacks fled to South Africa, desperately seeking peace and safety after enduring violent and terrifying rapes.  While their courage and resilience continually amazes us, they are physically and emotionally depleted.  Some are HIV positive from the gang rapes.  Some are pregnant from their rapists.  Nearly all are haunted by recurring nightmares and flashbacks from their attacks, which occurred as recently as last August.  A number of the women we met do not have enough money to call Zimbabwe to find out if their families are alive.  Some, including young girls in their early twenties, are utterly and painfully alone because the ZANU-PF murdered their families - their parents, their siblings, their husbands, and even their very young children.  And the trauma from the sexual violence is palpable and intense.  One woman told us:

I just feel like my body no longer belongs to me.  I have lost my self-worth and self-esteem.  I don't feel like my old self, because in my heart I feel like a different person who has been raped.  It's like losing a sibling, when someone in your family dies.  It's like losing someone and you will never get them back. 

The decision to flee to South Africa -- made by women who were physically destroyed and mentally traumatized, carrying tiny babies and forced to abandon older children and ailing parents -- illustrates how horrific life within Zimbabwe has become and what a tragic and unthinkable choice these women faced.  Some of them risked death crossing into South Africa via the crocodile-infested Limpopo River, and others suffered further rapes and attacks from men who lurked at the border claiming to be guides.  Yet they have found no respite in South Africa.  Instead they are in an unwelcoming country -- outcasts instead of victims -- with nowhere to go, nowhere to work, nowhere to live, and nothing to eat.

The overall climate for refugees in South Africa is hostile and dangerous - violent xenophobic attacks in May of 2008 displaced over 100,000 immigrants and refugees. Yet Zimbabweans continue to pour across the border and close to 3 million now live in South Africa.  The South African government has refused to acknowledge the crisis or to provide any protection for the Zimbabweans that arrive daily.  Thousands were attempting to survive in an open field called the Showground in Musina, just across the Zimbabwean border. South Africa's Department of Home Affairs abruptly closed the Showground earlier this month, offering no other option for the Zimbabweans, including many unaccompanied minors.  They now have nowhere to go -- they have fled from the clutches of a murderous government right into the arms of a negligent one. 

One young girl named Rose* is tragically alone and struggling for survival within South Africa.  ZANU-PF youth militia violently gang-raped her inside her own home in Zimbabwe.  During the rape she could hear them beating her father to death outside.  Her siblings fled during the attack and she has not seen them since.  In a matter of hours, the ZANU-PF men destroyed her body, her family, her childhood and her life.  She is homeless and on her own in a foreign country.  When we met she told me quietly that she looks for work every day but is unable to find anything.  She is no longer able to afford food.  She dreams of her father often. 

Three thousand Zimbabwean refugees now sleep crammed together on every inch of the floors, stairwells, corners and crevices of the Central Methodist Church in downtown Johannesburg, with another 2,000 now living on the street outside the church.  The building barely functions as an overnight shelter and the numbers are much too large for the church to meet basic needs such as food and clothing.  Inadequate sanitation has raised fears about cholera outbreaks within the church, and local NGOs report that sexual violence has become a problem.  During our most recent visit, women living there told us they do not feel safe at night but have nowhere else to go.

The gender oppression that drives this campaign of rape is also what creates these inhumane choices for women and prevents them from healing.  Some women were forced to flee Zimbabwe because their in-laws disowned them after they were raped, claiming that the rapists must have been their "boyfriends." Many have been unable to speak to anyone about the rapes because of the pervasive stigma around sexual violence - some who did speak out were immediately ostracized by community members.  One young girl was gang-raped so violently she can no longer bear children - she has not told anyone about the rapes because she fears being ridiculed about her inability to conceive.  They are in unsafe and unbearable situations and forced to carry heavy burdens of trauma in silence. 

The women we met demonstrated immense courage and strength by simply surviving and sharing their stories, and AIDS-Free World is committed to seeking justice and accountability for the crimes perpetrated against them.  It is our hope that these women will find peace and healing and will be able to enjoy the human rights and human security that are every woman's--indeed, every person's--birthright. 

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* All names have been changed.

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